DOG-gone diets!

So, as you may have read, my dogs are on a diet. Sad, isn't it? You can see photos of my babies on my other blog here (by the way, I'd love for you to follow it!) They don't look that bad do they??? Well, according to the vet, they are "overweight." What does the stupid vet know anyway?

We picked Kai (our golden) out of her litter because of her small paws. I'm sure there were other reasons as well, but mainly, it was the paws. See, there's this mean little rumor floating around that you can judge how big a dog will get by the size of its paws as a puppy: big paws = big dog, small paws = smaller dog. It sort of reminds me of another little comparison rumor that floats around college (oh, who are we kidding? - and high school) campuses. Hehehe . . . yes, I am that immature. Moving on. Well, I have first-hand experience that this rumor is FALSE! (Oh, I'm back to the dog's paws one by the way). As Kai continued to grow . . . and grow . . . and grow, we soon realized that she just had baby feet and that the rest of her was not going to follow suit. I belive she topped out at 80ish pounds. Yup, that's right, our female golden retriever. But, you can't just judge a book from it's cover. You've got to do a little more digging. If we go back and take a look at Kai's mom . . . well unfortunately, I don't have a photo of her mom. But if I did, you'd see that she was sort of rotund herself. I think it runs in the family. Genetics, ya know? They are just big-boned!! I swear! Or, quoting from the fun animated movie Ice Age (BTW, do you know how much I love animated movies??? If you don't, I'm sure you'll soon realize based on my posts!):

Manny: I'm not fat. It's all this hair. It makes me look poofy.
Sid: Fine. You have fat hair, but when you're ready to talk, I'm here.

Yes, that is the ongoing joke in our household - Kai has fat hair. I think it's a perfectly logical explanation. Really. I can say that with a straight face. I swear. Well, the vet didn't buy that answer. So basically Kai has been on a diet since she turned 1. Yah, I know, sad.

And then there's Sequoia, our cute little sheltie. She may look like a miniture Lassie, but believe me, you do NOT want this dog saving you from a well. She'd be more likely to jump down there with you just so she's not alone. Severe dependency issues, I tell you. S.E.V.E.R.E. But you got to love her. Even if she slams her head into the door every morning as you leave the house. Yah, I think she may have brain damage. But she's adorable and I love her. And she really does have fat fur. If you've ever seen her in person, you can attest to that. But when she's wet she looks like a little drowned rat. So, she has a weight issue?? Naw, couldn't be. Damn vet. Again, telling us that she also needs to lose a few lbs. Did I mention that this is the same vet that now wants Kai to have a "Senior Wellness Exam" because she is a "senior citizen"? Yah, she's 7 people. Even in dog years (49), that's really not that senior. But, for the sake of argument, assume she IS a senior. Well then she should qualify for some AARP discount right?? Um, NO! They want to charge you MORE once they reach senior-status. Something seems backwards here. Damn vets. But I just got off track.

So now both of my babies are on a diet. We'd already been feeding them the weight management food. What else can we do??? Oh yah, well, I guess we could take them for more walks. You know, like responsible dog-owners. But we don't want to admit that THAT may be the problem because, ya know, that makes US look bad. So we decide to scale back on the amount of dog food they get - and supplement with foods that have more fiber so they feel full. Such as green beans. Yes, we are now feeding our dogs green beans. And pumpkin. And carrots. And rutabagas. Those dogs now hear a can opener and they are salivating at my feet. We've created monsters. But I have to admit, I have seen a noticeable difference. Especially in Sequoia. She has, well, a waistline. Imagine that! We have not had them weighed since the diet-edict came down, but I am hopeful. We shall see.

So needless to say, the entire household is on a diet. At least no one feels left out.

I did it!

We had two beautiful days here this weekend! So guess what I did? That's right, I got off my butt and went outside and did some cardio. [gasp] Yes, I know this is somewhat shocking to those who know me. But let's face it, not that many people actually read this! LOL It's not that I abhor working out or never do it; I just haven't done it, well, since Thanksgiving. Yup, that's about right. I haven't worked out since Turkey Day. There are many "reasons" why (it's the holiday season, the days are shorter so it gets darker earlier, it's too cold), but the truth is, I haven't wanted to. That and, well, it HAS been too cold for me to want to get up at the crack of dawn to work out. So I've been lax. And now with the legislative session about to start in a week, there will be no time for working out. I'm not exaggerating; I really will have no time. During session I generally work from 8 a.m. until midnight. So, yah, getting up at 6 a.m. to work out is not my idea of a good time during this time of year. Although, if our committee meetings stay on their current course (Thursday at 8 a.m.) I'll have to get up at 6 a.m. Wednesday and Thursday regardless, so at that point I might as well get up the same time Monday, Tuesday, and Friday and work out. Yah . . . we'll see. Not likely. But I guess there is always a chance I could stick with that.

Anyway, it was gorgeous here this weekend. So Saturday, Jeremy and I went out for a bike ride. It was great! We got bikes for Christmas and have only had the opportunity to ride them 3 times! Like I said, it's been cold . . . and rainy . . . . So we went riding yesterday and loved it. Then today we took the dogs for a walk around the neighborhood. I love when I can let them off leash because it allows me to walk faster and get more of a workout. When they are on the leash they always want to stop and sniff. I know, I know - they're dogs and that's what dogs do. But sheesh! But when they are off leash then I can continue to walk and they can catch up with me. It's perfect. Plus, I think they tend to get more exercise because they have the ability to run around more.

Did I mention that my dogs are also on a diet? Yah, well, that's a post for another day . . .

My theory on why the baby-boomer generation produced, well, so many babies

I solved one of life's questions last night. How come women back in the '30s or '40s (just pick a decade) popped out kids like a toaster popping out bread? It wasn't because couples were more in love back then or because women had more time on their hands or because it was "the" thing to do. No, it all had to with bed size. That's right folks. Size DOES matter . . . . at least in this sense.

Back in those days, couples most likely had double or full-sized beds. I would go out on a limb to say that having a queen bed was a luxury that most couples could not afford. Well what happens when you are sleeping in a double or full-sized bed? You touch, that's what happens.

As I'm laying in my queen-sized bed last night trying to fall asleep, I'm realizing there is no way to move without touching Jeremy. He starts out almost on "my" side of the bed to begin with! What do you think will happen as he tosses and turns throughout the night? OF COURSE he's going to end up on my side. It's inevitable. And being that close produces more body heat, which you know what that means . . . that I'm sweltering under the covers. And he wonders why I have to sleep with the fan on even if it is 20 degrees outside! It's because I'm so blasted hot under the covers and with the combination of our body temperatures.

So this gets me to thinking. If I feel this cramped in a queen bed, imagine what my grandparents or great-grandparents felt in a double or full bed. Sardines, that's what. And when you are that close to begin with, well, then there's really only one thing to do. Procreate. Hell, I bet sometimes it even happened on accident because everyone is just SO close. And as the decades passed and people became more and more obsessed with size, we eventually became a nation where a queen bed is unacceptable. "WHAT?!? You don't have a KING bed?" And then you're denied membership to your country club or something. I know I've been there . . . having that discussion with friends, coworkers, family, whoever, and someone asks what "size" mine is. And I sheepishly bow my head and whisper: Queen. And then everyone shakes their head in disappointment. Well, if it hasn't happened to you, then either you're the person shaking your head in disappointment or you're lying to yourself!

And let's be honest, who wouldn't want a king bed? I know I do. I have "king-bed envy." I think it's an actual disease. All that room. You don't even have to touch if you don't want to. In fact, if you get a California King, you could be so far on the other side of the bed that you don't even notice when your spouse crawls into bed! You can roll over approximately 3 times and still not be on your spouse's side of the bed. Genius! Now I'm sure this may hurt in the procreation department, but all it means is that you have to make a little bit of effort. Now has effort ever really hurt anyone? Plus, with all that extra room, it may create some wonderful opportunities for experimentation! (Not that I know anything about that or anything - remember, I have a queen bed).

So now you know my theory. Now, let's have some fun!