So we show up for our class on Monday not knowing what to expect. First, our teacher is NOT what I was expecting. She's got this long hair (unusual for older women .... unless they are a hippy .... hmmmm) and she's so soft spoken. But she was highly recommended by two of my friends. So I keep an open mind. We sit down and start looking through our packet of information. What first caught my attention were the "affirmations." We received two sheets of paper: Affirmations for the Expectant Mother and Affirmations for the Expectant Father. There was definitely some corniness in there, but I still kept an open mind. I won't write out all of the affirmations but they were along the lines of: "Pregnancy is beautiful," "childbirth is a normal healthy event," and "my mate and I are the center of the childbearing experience." But the one that got me - and yes, I DID laugh out loud (I hope that doesn't get me kicked out) - was the one that said "I am able to flow with labor in perfect harmony with nature." Um, excuse me? Yah, right. As I'm shoving something the size of a watermelon out of my who-ha, I do not expect to be in perfect harmony. But heck, what do I know? I've never done this before. 
Oh and we had to fill out this information sheet. One of the questions asked how I feel about using drugs to help with the pain. My answer: BRING IT ON. Literally, that is what I wrote. I see no reason to lie. So that's about how the class started.
Oh and we had to fill out this information sheet. One of the questions asked how I feel about using drugs to help with the pain. My answer: BRING IT ON. Literally, that is what I wrote. I see no reason to lie. So that's about how the class started. After the other classmates arrived - there are 7 other couples besides us - we went around and introduced ourselves. We are the "out of place" couple in that our baby isn't due until Dec. 1 and everyone else in the class is due early to mid November (and one woman is actually due the end of October). But come to find out that the hospital tour is done on the last class, so at least we know we'll be around to do that whereas some of these other ladies could easily go into labor before then! See? I'm always thinking ahead. Only two of the couples (we were one of them) don't know the sex of the baby. That was pretty cool.
We then split into groups of men and women to discuss the "changes" we've noticed with the pregnancy. The ladies' answers mainly were "we are always hot," "higher libido," "trouble sleeping," etc. The men's answers were more about dealing with our hormonal changes, worrying about the financial aspect, and sleeping less because we aren't sleeping well. It was sort of funny. But that was the fun part of the class. I enjoyed just sitting there with the other women talking about our pregnancy. It was reassuring to know that these other women felt a lot of what I'm feeling.
But after that it sort of went downhill. We sat while our teacher brought out photos of the female body showing us where baby is and how our insides get squished and manipulated as baby grows. Ok, so that part was actually quite fascinating. I mean, by week 34 or so your bladder has completely disappeared. Crazy! No wonder I have to pee all the time. I can't imagine how it will be in another month! But that part also scared the crap out of me - seeing the size of the baby compared to where baby is supposed to make his/her debut? Yah, scary.
Then teacher went over symptoms of pregnancy and what certain things mean and when we should go to the doctor. I guess that was helpful. The most helpful part to me was being told to take note of the time your water breaks and what color it is. I mean, who knew to take note of the color! But if it's green, well then that's bad news bears. I think the thought of green "stuff" coming out of my body convinced Jeremy that we may need to buy a waterproof mattress pad . . . and maybe even something for the couch. LOL Teacher is nice, but she loses her train of thought and therefore repeats herself A LOT. That's just annoying. But the most annoying thing of it all was when she decided to go over the above-mentioned affirmations. She literally read them word by word to us. Maybe it's just us, but at least Jeremy and I feel the same way on this: we can't stand when someone reads to us - when we have the paper right in front of us. We are all adults and, from the introductions, we are all educated. We don't need you to read to us like children. UGH!
Well luckily after that we went into our "relaxation exercises." For this first class we just both laid flat on the floor (interesting to me that she had us do this considering our doctors tell us NOT to lay flat on our back) and then we just did some breathing exercises to relax. I guess it worked. But there were times that I almost cracked up (and come to find out later that Jeremy did too). At one point Teacher starts talking about baby being all safe and comfortable in the amniotic fluid. Well all I could think about is this green fluid filled with baby's poop she had talked about earlier. I almost lost it right there. Jeremy confessed later that he almost started laughing when she was telling us to relax each and every toe: "Relax your big toe, now relax your second toe" and so on and so on. And he envisioned her saying "now relax your 6th toe." I have no clue why he thought this. He's weird. My weird husband. But as we were driving home and discussing all of this neither of us could quit laughing. We were cracking each other up. And it's then that we realized that we may not be able to look at each other in this class - or else we will start laughing .... and get kicked out.
So that was class 1. We'll see how the rest of them go.
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